Into Slumber

Pinterest is a wonderful resource. I use it to find images of beautiful girls, so I can identify them and abduct them, then imprison them in my basement to use them as sex slaves – though, given my advancing age, I admit I am more likely to require them to do the washing up than to perform erotic acts. Still, I have a need for attractive young women who can provide both sexual pleasure and perform domestic chores. A sex-slave-cum-maidservant, if that doesn’t sound too vulgar. The odd thing is that I hadn’t realised until quite recently that there already was an American term for such a girl that summarised her function perfectly. I came across it quite inadvertently. I’d been browsing through the images of potential new victims Pinterest was offering to me, and had found one very pretty girl whose charming smile had enchanted me. It even looked for a moment as if she had a pair of handcuffs attached to her bag, which would have proved useful when the time for her abduction came, but t

Sometimes I feel people don’t take me entirely seriously when I make comments about their appalling standards of grammar, spelling, and punctuation. But I have proof of the perils that lie in store for them if they continue in their slovenly ways. Artificial humans are even now being sent to test the grammatical skills of the members of Facebook and similar social networking sites, and if they fail, to kill them. Last year they carried out a trial on the employees of a certain well-known company. Now they are ready to continue their task in the rest of the English-speaking world. You don’t believe me? I invite you to view the image below, and to accept the truth.